While I recently shared my Top 10 films of 2022 (you can check them out HERE), today is a far less joyous occasion. In keeping with tradition, it’s time for me to share my picks for the five worst movies I had the displeasure of seeing in 2022. It’s sad to say, but there was some healthy competition this year. Yet I did my duty and finally whittled them down to five? So here we go. Enjoy….I guess.
Dishonorable Mentions: “Jackass Forever”, “Halloween Ends”, “Hellraiser”, “Texas Chainsaw Massacre”, “Blonde”, “Mack & Rita”, “Bullet Train”, “X”, “Thor: Love and Thunder”, “Spiderhead”, “Brazen”, “Interceptor”, “Senior Year”, “Firestarter”, “The Long Night”, “Alice”
#5 – “Me Time” [REVIEW]
Kevin Hart and Mark Wahlberg in a Netflix buddy comedy. That should be ample warning for anyone going into “Me Time”. And wouldn’t you know it, it’s exactly the kind of movie you’d expect it to be. It’s bland and formulaic, leaving its audience in a haze of flat jokes, predictable story beats, and one of the most cringe-worthy music numbers you’ll ever see. Everything about it feels canned and processed. I should have heeded the warning.
#4 – “Babylon” [REVIEW]
Technically there are a lot worse movies than Damien Chazelle’s “Babylon”. But this grating three-hour exercise in unbridled self-indulgence is easily one of the most annoying and frustrating films of the year. “Babylon” is so beholden to its brash, gleefully vulgar, full-throttled vision that it doesn’t have time to do anything with its characters other than revel in their self-destruction. And don’t get me started on its ending – easily one of the phoniest things I’ve seen all year.
#3 – “The Requin” [REVIEW]
I went in thinking, “It’s a shark movie. Even if it’s not great it could still be fun.” Well, it is a shark movie so I got that part right. Otherwise “The Requin” is burdened with undercooked family drama, a goofy survival angle, laughably corny dialogue, exaggerated performances, and some incredibly dumb decisions from its characters. And that’s before the glaringly CGI sharks finally arrive. Instead of livening things up, they only manage to make things worse. Yikes.
#2 – “9 Bullets” [REVIEW]
Oh boy. So I didn’t have any real expectations for “9 Bullets” and that’s probably a good thing. This clunky action-thriller (in name only) is a movie full of pieces that don’t fit. None of its emotions feel sincere, and the characters are so constricted by formula that they barely seem human. Inescapably hokey, utterly implausible, and with arguably the year’s most hilariously bad ending this side of “Barbarian”, “9 Bullets” had to have looked a lot better on paper.
#1 – “The Bubble” [REVIEW]
Talk about a terrible waste of a lot of good talent. “The Bubble” certainly won’t appear on the career highlight reel of anyone involved. Instead, this misguided COVID-era clunker is more of a stain. Judd Apatow directs this scattershot mess that’s so full of itself it doesn’t seem to know how unfunny it is. At over two hours, the film is an insufferable slog, full of groan-worthy gags and even worse characters. Perhaps there’s a good idea for a movie in there somewhere. But I’m not willing to endure a second sitting just to find out.
Keith & the Movies 
To me, it’s a tie between Blonde and Thor: Love and Blunder for the worst of last year. I appreciate what Andrew Dominik was trying to go for with Blonde, but he just ended victimizing Marilyn Monroe again. It was an absolutely vile movie. Ana De Armas was great, but the movie around was disgusting. Thor: Ragnarok was awesome because it balanced out the goofy stuff with serious elements. Love and Blunder was too much of a comedy that made Thor look like a total doofus. It’s a huge reason why Taika Waititi needs to be held back in many ways.
I agree with both of your summarizations. I disliked both and have no real desire to see them again.
I have no interest in Me Time as I just flat out don’t like Kevin Hart and I think Mark Wahlberg has been doing too many bad movies lately. I have no interest in The Bubble as I’ve become dissatisfied with a lot of Judd Apatow’s films since This is 40 as I feel they’re too long and often feels bloated and tries too hard to be funny and fail.
Good move on both. They’re stinkers and exactly what you probably expect them to be (sadly).
The thing about Judd Apatow that frustrates me is that there are good movies in his films but he needs to simplify and trim it down to 90-105 minutes.
Definitely. He has gone way off the tracks. I’m not sure why, but he seems to have bypassed the formula that made him successful.
I’m checking out Babylon in a few nights because the vitriolic reactions have been really intriguing. It’s one of those cases where I might just a rubbernecking reviewer, just peeking my head in to see how bad it really is. Which is how I treated 50 Shades of Gray lol
Outside of that, I have no interest in sitting through any of these. They all sound like “worthy” picks for this post!
It’s funny, there doesn’t seem to be any middle ground with Babylon. I’ve seen people who disliked as much as me. But I’ve also seen it on a few Top 10 lists. It seems to be that kind of movie.
Noo I like Babylon! We actually don’t share any “worsts” Right now I’m sitting at White Noise, Blonde, Men, Windfall, and The Silent Twins. I had Deep Water written in my drafts too but I cannot remember a thing about that movie anymore.
Oooh yea. Deep Water was so forgettable. I’m with White Noise like you are with Babylon. And Men…talk about a disappointment! Windfall was so frustratingly bland. That film should’ve and could’ve been better.
Have only seen 2 of these, Thor, yes a worst, but Bullet Train was fun!
I made it through Bullet Train. One of my greater life accomplishments of the past year. LOLOL
Haha well each to his own and all that. 🤣
Absolutely. My wife tells me that all the time when it comes to movies!😂😂
Just writing my review for Babylon currently and I have to agree with you. Such promising ambitions, but ends up being a disaster. Not the worst movie of the year, but definitely gonna be in my top ten worst.
It such a disappointment on so many levels. It’s exhausting in the worst way and a waste of a lot of good talent. I think it frustrated me more than any other 2022 movie.
I did like “X” and “Bullet Train” and agree with you on the new Thor movie (YUK!) but haven’t seen the rest and don’t plan on seeing them. My Worst Films List for 2022: Nope, Elvis, Morbius, Thor: Love & Rockets, and Studio 666.
Oh yes. I wasn’t high on “Nope” and the only reason it didn’t get a dishonorable mention was because I’m determined to give it one more chance. Expectations are low, but we’ll see. Really didn’t care for “Studio 666” either.
With Babylon being #4 here…my mind “reels” at the frightening thoughts of just how awful the top three must be…
HA!!! They’re dreadful. Trust me! 😂